I've found myself afraid of summer.
The thought of remembering it alone,
Surviving it without half of myself.
I never dreaded the sunshine or the green grass,
I never had trouble sleeping until now.
Heavy eyes and sleepless nights.
Everyone tells me I look great.
I wish I felt that way.
Haunted by my own mind,
My quiet place now somewhere I can't avoid.
Never knew I could feel this hopeless, this broken.
I always loved the desert and she finally called me home again.
I hope the gumbo lilies bloom full force this year,
And the summer thunder showers wash away my tears.
Xoxo, Gussie
